Wood-Eye

Once upon a time there was this young boy who was born with one eye. So
his father made him a wood-eye. One day when the boy got older he had
heard from a friend that there was a dance at the town's local bar. He
begged his father if he could go and is father said sure. When he got
there he felt all alone because he was the only one with a handicap. Then
across the room there sat a girl who also had a handicap. She had a
hairlip. He looked at her and said, "Would you like to dance!" The girl
looked at him and said, "Would I!" He then looked at the girl and said,
"Wood-eye! Don't call me wood-eye you pussy faced son-of-a-bitch!"