For Stupid:
Hey, your house is calling, and they're missing their idiot.
Where were you when God gave out brains?
How many times have you crawled into the hole that said 'lowers your IQ'?
Did you get dropped on your head when you were little and your mom said you were just 'special'?
Did you like getting hit by the stupid stick?
For Ugly:
Did you perhaps get run over by a truck sometime in your life?
Note: You can use stupid insults and change them to ugly insults by a word and vice versa.
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