When one turns to the other and says, "well time to head out, my wife told me if I came home so drunk I pissed myself again I'd be in big trouble". His friend says "Here's an idea! Just take a twenty dollar bill from the ATM and when you get home just tell her someone accidentally poured a drink on your lap and felt so bad they gave you the twenty for dry cleaning!".
"That's brilliant" says the first man and continues drinking.
Later that night, so drunk he's pissed himself, he stumbles home and his wife is understandably furious. "It's not what you think!" he says, "this guy spilled a drink on me and look here, he gave me this twenty for the dry cleaning!" handing his wife the bill.
"Wait this is a fifty!" she says.
"Oh I didn't tell you? He shit my pants as well!
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