"Oh No" he cries, wiping his mouth. "My wifsh gonna fucking kill me!"
"Nah, Nah. Don't sweat it." pipes up drunk 2. "Jush put $20 in your shirt pocket and tell her some sick bastard spewed all over you but gave you money to cover the cleaning."
"Thatsh fuggin brilliant. I'll do that" and staggers off home.
When he opens the front door his wife is on for a fight after seeing her husbands sorry state. "Have a look at yourself you dumb drunk."
"Nah Baby, it's not like that. Some silly prick chucked all over me at the pub but he put $20 in my pocket to shay shorry".
The drunks wife walks over and snatches the money from his pocket, looks at it and says "But there's $40 here"
"I know" says the drunk. "I forgot to say... he shat himself as well"
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