(For best results, imagine these in the voice of your favorite talk show host)
In Michigan, a man was arrested after he tried to toss a football filled with drugs into a prison. Prison guards knew something was wrong when they heard 700 inmates shouting, “I’M OPEN! I’M OPEN!”
The United States announced they’ve arrested the mastermind of the 2012 attack in Benghazi. When Republicans heard the news, they said, “Oh great! They caught Hillary Clinton!”.
Coca Cola is testing a new, low-calorie version of Coke in a green can called “Coca Cola Life.” The original formula of Coke in the red can will be rebranded as “Coca Cola Death.”
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