(for best results, read in the voice of your favorite late night host)
In Indiana, a pizza delivery man received a $1,200 tip from college students. College officials applauded the act of charity, until they realized the “pizza” was just a box with $1,200 dollars worth of weed in it.
To thwart corruption, traffic police in Thailand will now receive a bonus if they refuse bribes. The plan affects all levels of Thailand police, from the street-level Bribe Solicitor, to Director of Bribes, all the way up to Bribe King.
…the anti-corruption program will be funded by confiscated bribes.
Lawmakers have approved $700 million dollars to help fight Ebola. The lawmakers announced the news from inside their $700 million dollar Ebola-proof bunker.
In North Korea, Kim Jong-Un has not made a public appearance for several weeks. Kim’s unexplained absence has sparked rumors in the state-run media that everything is totally fine.
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