Three men appear in heaven

Three men appear in heaven at the same time. They approach the pearly gates when they're stopped by St. Peter.

"Woah, woah, woah! Sorry, heaven's been a bit busy today and we're starting to get overcrowded. The Big Man told me I'm only allowed to let people who died sad deaths in today. If you can tell me how you died, and I think it's pitiful enough, I'll let you in."

"I'll tell my story first," says one man.
"So, I'd been pretty certain lately that my wife had been cheating on me. I only didn't have any proof. I thought the best way to find out would be to catch her in the act. I devised a whole plan: I left the condo for work in the morning as normal, then I got in the elevator. Once I'd gone down to the lobby, I took the elevator back up and busted into my condo. There my wife was, sitting on the couch reading a magazine. Silly me, I thought, thinking my wife was cheating on me. Except I saw a pair of hands hanging on off the ledge of the balcony of my condo. So this is the man! Oh, I was so livid, I ran over to the ledge and started stomping on his hands. He still wasn't letting go. So I ran into my condo and grabbed a hammer and started banging on his knuckles. Finally, he let go and fell three stories and landed in a bush. Bruised up, but still okay. I wanted to end this thing so I ran into the kitchen, dragged the refrigerator and pushed it over the ledge onto the man, killing him instantly. After all that excitement, I had a heart attack right then and there and died."

St. Peter said "wow. That is a pitiful death. Okay, you can come in. Next?"

The second man said,
"Well, I was doing my daily workout routine on my balcony. While doing jumping jacks, I'm not sure how, but I lost my balance and fell off the balcony. Next thing I know, I'm holding on for dear life to the balcony on the level beneath my condo. This is the end, I thought. Except, just then a man stepped over to me. I'M SAVED, I thought. That was until he started stomping on my hands. I was terrified. When he realized I wasn't letting go, he ran inside and came back with a hammer. He hammered on my knuckles until I finally let go, falling three stories and landing in a bush, bruised but okay. As I reached for my phone to call for help, suddenly I see a refrigerator fall from the condo and smashing into me, killing me instantly."

St. Peter said, "wow. That, too, is a pitiful death. Okay, you can come in. Next?"

The third man comes up to tell his story
"Okay, picture this... I'm hiding in a refrigerator."