The Top 12 Signs Your Classmates Are on Viagra (Part I)

12> Reading circle guffaws at every "See Dick go. Go Dick. Go. Go. Go."


11> "Tent-making" is a frequent show-and-tell theme.


10> "Nigel?"
"No."
"Simon?"
"No."
"Terry?"
"No."
"Come now, certainly *one* of you can demonstrate this equation on the chalkboard."


9> It seems like every other yearbook quote is from Rafael Palmeiro.


8> "You back there with your hand up... oh, my God!"


7> That poor climbing rope in the gym is seeing more action than Madonna.


6> Instead of one measly vice principal, your school now has an entire vice squad.


5> Peepholes between boys' and girls' locker rooms are now waist-high.


4> Other kids' shadow pictures during filmstrips: dogs and bunnies. His shadow pictures during filmstrips: rockets and bananas.


3> Uptick in wrestling team interest offset by huge increases in clean-up costs.


2> "I will leave more room between me and Billy in the lunch line.
I will leave more room between me and Billy in the lunch line.
I will leave more room between me and Billy in the lunch line."


1> The swim team members no longer have problems staying in their own lanes.


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[ Copyright 2003 by Chris White ]