A man with a dog walks into a talent agent, and says "I have a talking dog, he'll be the biggest attraction in town". The agent is skeptical of course but tells the man to proceed.
The man says "okay, Fido, what's on the outside of a tree?", to which the dog replies "bark!"
The agent is about to speak, but the man says "I know what you're thinking, we're not done yet. Fido, how does sandpaper feel?", and the dog says "rough!"
The agent starts to say "listen, buddy", but the man is insistent and says "Fido, what's on top of a house?", and the dog says "roof!"
At this point the agent has had enough, but he has a feeling the man might be delusional and not just a fraud, so to show that the dog can't really speak, he grabs a newspaper and shows it to the dog and says "okay, Fido, what's the headline on today's newspaper?"
The dog just looks at him confused, and the agent tosses them out.
Outside, the man looks at the dog and says "what was that about, why didn't you say anything?"
To which the dog says "you know dogs can't read!"
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