The Tale of the Magic Dildo

A woman is married to a great man, and they are perfect for each other. They love each other dearly, have almost no marital issues, and their sex life is especially great. Well....when he's there. You see, this guy makes a lot of money, but has to travel a lot for work. So, naturally, they start to miss each other, and the wife confesses that she misses sex a lot. The husband, being open minded and chill about the whole thing, tells her he has no problems with her going to get masturbatory aids from a sex shop. She's a bit nervous, but after some thinking, she decides to give it a go.

The next day, she's in a local sex shop in her town, and she's looking around. She's never really had any experience with this kind of thing, so she's wandering around looking at things, before she hears "pssp...." behind her. She ignores it. "Pssp....you..." She turns around and see's an old lady standing beside a door in the back of the shop. So she walks up to the old lady, and the strange elder says "Come with me, I know what you need for when your husband is on another trip..." Amazed, the young wife follows the old woman into the back room, only to see a single table with a box on it. The old woman hands the box over and beckons her to open it. Nervously, the young lady opens it, to see a dusty dildo. "Ma'am...thank you, but I think I just want to buy one from out there.." she said, looking at the strange gift. The old woman laughs and says "Oh young lady, that's no ordinary dildo. This one, you see, is magical. If you say 'Magic dildo, my' followed by where you want it, it will pleasure you until you tell it to stop. There's nothing like it. Take it home, try it out. I promise you'll love it..." Scared, but curious, the young lady thanks the old woman and leaves.

The young woman sits down on her bed when she gets home and looks at the closed box. She undresses, gets under the covers, and quietly says "....Magic dildo...my vagina..?" Amazingly, the box bursts open, the dildo flies out, and goes right into her just as she wants it to, and she gets the most amazing orgasm she's ever had. "MAGIC DILDO, STOP!" she cries in ecstasy, and it does, going back into the box.

Naturally, she becomes addicted. She uses it every night that her husband is gone. "Magic dildo, my vagina" every night for weeks. But every night, the dildo takes a little longer to actually stop and go back into the box. Until, one night, she's on the couch, squirming in pleasure, until she climaxes and says "Magic dildo...stop." It doesn't. "Magic dildo....stop." It keeps going inside her. "MAGIC DILDO, STOP!" It just keeps going as if she said nothing. Terrified, she awkwardly hobbles to her car after she throws on a dress, and speeds down the highway to get to the sex shop. She arrives, banging on the door. The old woman comes over and opens the door. "THIS THING WON'T STOP, IT HURTS SO BAD!" she says. "Oh sweetheart...Didn't I tell you? Use it too much, and it'll never stop. It needs to find a new owner, or it'll never stop again." Mortified, the young woman gets back into the car, sobbing, speeding to the hospital. Ten minutes into the drive, she see's police lights behind her. She stops the car and the officer approaches the window. He leans over and says "Ma'am, do you know you were going over 100 miles per hour...?" The woman, desperate, cries out "Sir, I know you won't believe me at first, but there is a magic dildo in me and it won't stop going! I need a doctor!"

The officer stares at her, then laughs.

"Ha! Magic dildo my ass..."