The Pirate

A man walks into a bar and finds a pirate seated at the bar.

The man takes a seat next to the pirate and notes the pirate has a peg leg, a hook, and an eye patch.

The man strikes up a conversation with the pirate and eventually works up the courage to ask him about his deformities.

"I'm terribly sorry if this is too personal, but how did you come to get your peg leg?"

The pirate shifted in his seat he looked back at the man and said, "Aye. 'Tis no trouble, lad. Lost me leg from cannon fire during a ship fight!"

Pressing further, the man asked, "Wow, that's incredible. And your hook? What's the story there?"

"Ah. The hook! The hand went during a sword fight. Lost me hand, but got the booty!"

Astonished, the man said, "You must have a crazy story for the eye patch then!"

"Aye the eye. Lost it after a seagull crapped in me eye!"

"You can lose your eye from seagull poop? I never knew!"

"No no no. Twas the first day with me hook."

Edit: Formatting.