The pianist

A man sees an advert for a pianist job in a hotel, and is
interested. He aproaches the receptionist in the hotel, and
says, "I want to see the fucking manager". The receptionists
requests the man not to use such language in the hotel, but
tells him he will go and get the manager.
So the receptionist introduces the man to the manager. "I'm here
for the fucking pianist job". Once again the man is requesed not
to use such language.
The manager asks if the pianist can play any classical music.
The pianist replays, "Can I play classical" and sits down at the
piano and plays the best classical music you've ever heard.
The manager is impressed, and asks for the name of the song, to
which the pianist replys, "I was sitting in the garden with my
bitch and the moonlight was shining off her nipples".
The manager is a little bit startled, but continues to ask the
pianist if he could play any blues. The man replys, "Can
I play blues" and goes on to play the greatest bluse you've ever
heard. Again the manger asks what the song was called, and the
pianist replys, "I bent her over the table and rammed her up the
arse".
Once again the manger was startled, however the pianist was
amazing so he offered the man the job on two conditions. He was
not allowed to speak to any guests, and he wasn't allowed to
introduce any of his songs. The man thought for a while but
finally agreed.
Things were going fine for the first week, until a gorgeous
looking woman entered the restaurant at the hotel. The pianist
wanted to speak to her but at the same time he wanted to keep
his job. So instead he went of to the toilet for a wank. Half
way through he heard the manager call out, "Where is that
pianist", so he just stopped what he was doing and ran back to
the piano and started playing again.
A few minutes later the woman approached the pianist and said,
"do you know your flys are undone, your cocks hanging out and
your dripping cum all over your shoes", to which the pianist
quickly replys, "do I know it? I fucking wrote the song!"