A woman lived alone for 30 years without a single date and had become very lonely. Out of desperation she put an ad in the newspaper asking for a man. The ad read as follows:
"I need a man who won't beat me, won't leave me, and is great in bed."
She submitted the ad and waited. A few days later her doorbell rang. She answered it and at her door was a man in a wheelchair with no arms and no legs.
She asked, "Can I help you?" The man replied, "I've come to answer your ad! As you can see, I have no arms so I can't beat you, and I have no legs so I can't leave you!"
"Okay," said the woman, "Well how are you in bed?"
The man replied, "How do you think I rang the doorbell?"
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