The drunk and the baptism

A drunk is walking home one afternoon from the bar when he sees a pastor having an baptism down the river bank. The pastor looks up and sees him. Calling out he says "Look! A lost member of our flock. Come down here son and be born again! Renounce your sins and be saved."

The drink squnts in the glare of the sun and, shrugging his shoulders noncomittally, shambles down the bank.

The pastor takes the drunkards arm and head and dunks him under the cool river water. Bringing him up he shouts so the congregation can hear "Have you found Jesus my son?"

The drunk looks wide eyed at the pastor and says "No!" But before he can protest he's thrust under the water a second time, for three long seconds before being lifted again.

"Have you found Jesus now?" He calls, projecting his voice farther.

The drunk splutters water out of his mouth "No, no I haven't".

A third time he's pushed under, for even longer, and when he's finally brought up he caughs and spits and thrashes.

"Have you found him? Have your found the lord?" The pastor's voice rings clearly in exaltation.

"No, no Father!" The drunk cries while still coughing more water out. "Are you sure this is where he fell in?"

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