The assistant pastor and Tootie Greene.

Recently, a new assistant pastor was hired for the local church. The head pastor told him on his first week to go down to the homeless shelter and work with the less fortunate. So the assistant pastor went down to the shelter with soup and bread. After feeding the people he gave a sermon. Most of the people at the shelter took their food and left, but one woman stayed and listened the entire time. The assistant pastor asked "What's your name, my dear?" "Tootie Greene," she replied, "thank you for the food, but I'm afraid I can't be helped by your words." "Why is that, Tootie?" "Well, you see, I got caught up in all kinds of drugs for years. I lost my family over my addictions, sold everything I had, I even sold my body when I was desperate enough." The assistant pastor saw that this woman meant well. "All can be forgiven, my child. Why don't you come to church this Sunday?" Tootie agreed to come to church that Sunday.

The assistant pastor went back to the church and told the pastor of his work. "There's this woman, Tootie Greene, who I met and will be coming to church this Sunday. I must warn you, pastor, she comes from a rough background of drugs and prostitution." The pastor acknowledged the fact and prepared for Sunday.

Sunday morning comes and the pastor and assistant pastor are standing in the front of the church as the congregation gathers. Suddenly, a woman wearing a short, low-cut dress, high heels, and globs of makeup walks down the aisle and sits front and center, right in front of the pastors. When she sits down she doesn't cross her legs, and spreads them enough that the pastors can see she isn't wearing any underwear. The main pastor turns to the assistant pastor and says, "Is that Tootie Greene?" to which the assistant pastor replies "No sir, I think that's just the way the stained glass is shining on it."