So there's this pregnant woman

and she goes into the doctors office whilst her husband is at work for her first scan after conception. The doctor after about 5 minutes of scratching his head says to the woman, " Well by my beard you're pregnant with triplets". The woman retorts and immediately gets out her phone to call her husband, the husband being as shocked as she was, responds with " go to the bank and take out the biggest home loan you can, we are going to need a big house for this family". The wife agrees and waddles over to the bank, whilst withdrawing money a robber kicks down the door with a pump action shotgun and demands everyone to get on the floor. The woman, trying to carefully slide herself into a safe position onto the ground gets screamed at for being too slow and then shot in the stomach. She miraculously lives but has 3 pellet entries in her stomach and immediately rushes to the doctors to check whether her babies are alive and well. Once she is patched up and the bleeding has been stopped she gets told that the babies are all alive.
"What should i do with the pellets?, how do they come out?, am i going to need surgery?", the woman pleas with the doctor who in turn is lazy and tells her "nah you'll be right".

13 Years later, she has 2 daughters and 1 son. One day one of her daughters comes out of the bathroom and exclaims, " Mommy what is this, (holding out the bullet) it came out of my mouth when i was brushing my teeth, what do i do?". The woman being petrified responds with the birds and the bees story and telling her that the pellet is in fact all part of puberty. The daughter shrugs and moves off, The second daughter comes out of the outhouse toilet and asks " mommy mommy, you will never believe what i found, i was taking a piss and this plopped out!" , the daughter holds up a piss soaked bullet and once again the mother explains it being part of having a period and what not. Finally her only son comes out of his bedroom with a guilty look on his face, " Mommy mommy you will NEVER believe what just happened to me". The mother being sick to death of explaining about puberty says, "let me guess, you farted and a bullet came out, or you sneezed or spat one out?". The boy looks puzzled then responds, " Nah , i was wanking and i shot the Dog"