Since I started dating my girlfriend half a year ago I became a millionaire

Two necrophiles...

Necrophile 1: What happened with you and Brenda? Necrophile 2: Ah, you know...

What should you...

What should you do if a monster runs through your front door? Run through the...

Chuck Norris...

Chuck Norris doesnt count it as sex unless the woman dies.

I don't have a...

its just "fun sized".

So my dyslexic...

We find a table, and he volunteers to go and get the drinks. Taking the...

I make apocalypse...

Like there's no tomorrow

If I had a dollar...

I'd be making money in a really weird way

I've said it...

It.

If it weren't for...

If it weren't for the last minute, nothing would ever get done.

Just before Rosh...

Just before Rosh Hashana, a team of terrorists invades the shul and takes...