- His first words to the congregation on Sunday morning are "alright, listen
up you heathens..."
- He falls asleep during his own sermon.
- He shows up for Sunday service wearing Bermuda shorts and a Tank Top
- Every time his pager goes off, he shouts, "Why can't they just leave me
alone?!"
- Announces baptismal services will be at the Grand Canyon
- You go to his office for counseling and pour your heart out to him and he
says, "Sounds like a personal problem to me."
- For the past two months he has preached the same sermon every Sunday.
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