Saskatchewan Computer Terms

Log on -- Make the wood stove hotter
Log off -- Don't add no more wood


Monitor -- Keep an eye on that wood stove


Download -- Getting the firewood off the truck


Floppy disk -- What you get from trying to carry too much firewood


Ram -- The thing that splits the firewood


Hard drive -- Getting home in the winter


Prompt -- What the mail ain't in the winter


Window -- What to shut when it's cold outside


Screen -- What to shut in black fly season


Byte -- What the black flies do


Bit -- What the black flies did


Mega Byte -- What the BIG black flies do chip Munchies for TV


Micro Chip -- What's left in the bag after you eat the chips


Modem -- What you did to the hay fields


Dot matrix -- Old Dan Matrix's wife


Lap top -- Where the kitty sleeps


Software -- The dumb plastic knives & forks they give you at McDonalds


Hardware -- The real stainless steel cutlery.


Mouse -- What eats grain in the barn


Main frame -- What holds the barn up


Enter -- City talk for - "come on in, eh?"


Web -- What a spider makes


Web -- Site The barn or the attic


Cursor -- Someone who swears


Search Engine -- What you do when the car dies


Screen Saver -- A repair kit for the torn window screen


Home Page -- A map you keep in your back pocket just in case you get lost in the field.


Upgrade -- Steep hill.


Server -- The person at the ABC that brings the food.


Mail Server -- The guy at the ABC that brings the food.


MSDOS -- Some new disease they discovered.


Sound Card -- One of them technological birthday cards that plays music when you open it.


User -- The neighbor who keeps borrowing stuff.


Browser -- What they call you when your eye brows grow together.


Network -- When you have to repair your fishing net.


Internet -- Complicated fish net repair method.


Netscape -- When a fish maneuvers out of reach.


Online -- When you get the laundry hung out on the washline.


Offline -- The clothes pins let go and the laundry falls on the ground.