A pregnant woman is in labor for many hours at the hospital. Finally the baby is delivered, and the exhausted woman holds out her arms. "Give me my baby," she says. "I want to hold my baby."
"Just a moment, ma'am," the doctor says. "I'm sure you know there's a routine procedure we follow for newborns." He turns the child over and slaps it on its butt.
"OK," says the woman. "Now give me my baby."
"Just a moment, ma'am, just a moment," says the doctor. Then he turns the baby over again, and punches it square in the face.
The woman gasps. "Ok, ok!" she says. "Now give me my baby!"
"Ma'am," the doctor says reassuringly. "Trust me. I'm a professional. Just one more moment, please." With this, he takes the baby by the ankles, raises it above his head, and slams it against a steel operating table, over and over again.
"Oh my God!" the woman screams. "You killed my baby!"
"Aw, I'm just fucking with you," the doctor laughs. "It was already dead."
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