Pirate walks in a bar with his ship's steering wheel stuffed in his pants. The bartender asks do you know that's in your pants?

Why Mexico is...

Because anyone who can run, jump or swim is in the US.

What do Bitcoin...

It'll get you to the moon and back. No transportation needed.

What do you call...

The rePUBlican

I did it Reddit!...

I finally made it to the front page!

A quote on marriage

Marriage is a rest period between romances.

Two military men...

One from the Army. One from the Marines. They both go pee, and finish around...

There's a problem...

They never wink back.

Eyes shut

A man goes into a bar and asks the barmaid for a drink. The barmaid gives...

A lot more...

The movie just touched on the tip of the iceberg.

Every woman I've...

...in their rearview mirror.