OCD Bartender

A husband and wife walk into the cleanest bar you've ever seen. It is their monthly date night and they are dressed to impress! The first thing they notice walking through the doors is a sparkle emitting from the glasses across the establishment. They look around and notice pictures on the wall lined up as if they were hung on a grid system. They proceed through the aisles of tables with stowed chairs positioned in perpendicular fashion to the next. The husband glances at TVs placed at the perfect angle no matter how far they've walked. Some time has been put into installing them! At the same time the wife notices how beautifully color-coordinated the room appears. The guy does, too.

They arrive at two barstools and find a break in their observations to get out a few words mentioning the majesticness of the place compared to the stereotypical bars they are used to frequenting. There was none of the odors or trash laying around that they had grown accustomed to seeing. The bartop in front of them seemed to have dismissed even the faintest of smudges.

At that moment they realized their thirst and remembered why they were there in the first place. Not surprisingly, the bartender suddenly became available and gave the introduction, "Hello, fine people. My name is Tim and it is a pleasure having you in my bar. Take your time and.." Silence. Utter horror. Horror! Tim, the bartender, recognizes that the husband is sporting a tie with a loose knot. Tim, twitching and with ready hands, asks if he may fix the husband's obvious oversight.

Ready to order and not having heard the bartender, the husband says, "Surely, Tim. Pull my tie." The bartender gratefully obliges and lunges at the man's neck. The husband becomes startled and punches the bartender in the face. Twice. He grabs his wife and they run out promising never to order the same two drinks again.