....sits down, and orders a scotch. At the other end of the bar he sees a geologist knocking them back like there's no tomorrow. Concerned, Calvin approaches the man and says, "What's troubling you friend?" The geologist says, "I broke my carbon today at work, oh my god, I'm gonna get fired, I have a family, what's going to happen to my kids?" Then a dawn of realization hits him. "Wait, you're Melvin Calvin! Can you fix my Carbon?" Calvin thinks about it a little, looking the man up and down, checking out the geologist's uniform. After a while, he finally says, "Depends... RUBP?"
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