Meeting the parents

A man goes to meet his girlfriends parents, but they live far away and he doesn't have a car.

So off he goes looking for a car - and he finds one, a clunky banger but with a really clean engine.

"Nice car man" he says to the seller, "That is one smooth engine."

"You bet," says the seller, and then with some afterthought, "tell you what kid, I like the look of you - I'll sell this car to you cheap if you promise to keep her in good nick."

"Hell yeah!" he says eagerly, still amazed by sound of the engine

"Good, all you need to do is put some lube down the exhaust just before it starts to rain. You *must* do this without fail, or it will rust. You promise?"

"Promise," he says, and gladly pays the seller who hands him over the keys and a large tub of lube for the rain.

That evening he sets off with his girlfriend to her parents house in their new car, and right as he's about to ring the doorbell - his girlfriend grabs his hand and says:

"My parents are very nice accommodating people, but they have ONE rule - whoever talks first during dinner has to do the washing up."

The guys shrugs 'okay', and in they go.

Her parents really are as easy-going and open-minded as his girlfriend made them out to be, but then they all sat down for dinner and the conversation suddenly stopped.

They all ate in silence, and as each course of the meal progressed the plates started to pile up. *That sure is one big stack of washing up* thought the man to himself, *these guys will probably commit murder before they speak again*.

Figuring that he could get away with anything, he gets up and stands behind his girlfriend, and starts fondling her breasts really intimately, finally pulling her up from the chair and breaking out into full blown sex on the dinner table as her parents watch in mute bewilderment.

After he finishes and no one says a word, he looks past his girlfriend at her mother and figures that she's not that bad looking either. He gets up and stands behind his girlfriend's mother, and starts fondling her breasts really intimately, finally pulling her up from the chair and breaking out into full blown sex on the dinner table as her husband and her daughter watch in mute bewilderment.

After he finishes and still no one has said a word, he looks past his girlfriend's mother and sees that it is raining outside. Remembering what he was told to do for the car exhaust, he pulls out the giant tub of lube and -

"Stop" says the father, "I will do the washing up."