Let's Get Technical

In 2031, President Clinton finishes his time on earth and
approaches the Pearly Gates of Heaven...


"And who might you be?" inquires St. Peter. "It's me, Bill
Clinton, formerly the President of the United States and Leader
of the Free World."


"Oh...Mr....... President! What may I do for you?" asks St.
Peter. "I'd like to come in," replies Clinton.


"Sure," says the Saint. "But first, you have to confess your
sins. What bad things have you done in your life?"


Clinton bites his lip and answers, "Well, I tried marijuana, but
you can't call it 'dope-smoking' because I didn't inhale. There
were inappropriate extramarital relationships, but you can't
call it 'adultery' because I didn't have full 'sexual
relations.' And I made some statements that were misleading, but
legally accurate, but you can't call it 'bearing false witness'
because, as far as I know, it didn't meet the legal standard of
perjury."


With that, St. Peter consults the Book of Life briefly, and
declares, "OK, here's the deal. We'll send you somewhere hot,
but we won't call it 'Hell.' You'll be there indefinitely, but
we won't call it 'eternity.' And when you enter, you don't have
to abandon all hope, just hold your breath waiting for it to
freeze over."