John And OFFICER Very Funny

john was pulled over for driving too fast, even though he thought he was driving just fine.

Officer: You were speeding.
john: No, I wasn't.
Officer: Yes, you were. I'm giving you a ticket.
john: But I wasn't speeding.
Officer: Tell that to the judge! (The officer gives man the ticket.)
john: Would I get another ticket if I called you a jerk?
Officer: Yes, you would.
john: What if I just thought that you were?
Officer: I can't give you a ticket for what you think.
john: Fine, I think you're a jerk

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