If y is dependent upon x, that means y is determined by x. So we could call y the determinant. If that's true, then we can call x Arnold...

I had to break it...

I can't be with someone who doesn't care about my needs.

This 5p bag tax...

I can get a 10bag for 50p

"Hey, what's that...

Yeah, non-alchoholics call that cinnamon.

I just got a text...

Did she just ask me to sleep with her in three letters? Nicely done!

What do you call...

A Bi bipolar polar bear!

The Lord of the...

The Lord of the Manor returned from his grouse hunt quite a bit earlier than...

A man walks into...

Then he asks the clerk whats his best dildo. The clerk pulls out a voodoo...

If someone does t...

doesn't that make them a cantibal?

What's a skunk's...

What's a skunk's favourite game in school? Show and smell!

She so fat

you mamma so fat her s**t looks like small black children.