Heaven is full

One day God approaches St. Peter:

"Peter!"

"Almighty father, what can I do for you?"

"Heaven is getting crowded, I need to buy some time while I expand."

"What would you have me do?"

"Only allow those who died truly horrible deaths in, until I tell you otherwise."

"Yes father."

Shortly after the first man arrives at Heaven's Gate.

"To pass, you must tell me about your death."

"Okay. So I was like 100% sure my wife was cheating on me while I was at work. So I decided to go home for lunch, which I never do, and sure as shit there she is naked in bed. She had clearly been busy getting fucked, so I began searching for the guy. I cant find him anywhere though, and we live on the tenth story so the only way in or out was through our front door. I knew he had to be somewhere in the apartment, and I finally found him hanging from my balcony; naked! I didn't even give him a chance to speak, I stomped on his hands till he fell. Can you believe this asshole survived! The bushes broke his fall. So I push my refrigerator onto the balcony, and flip it over the edge. As it was going over the power cord caught my foot and pulled me with it. I hit the pavement, and now I'm here."

"Oh my, that is horrible. Please come in."

Just then, a second man arrives.

"To pass, you must tell me about your death."

"Well, I lived in an eleventh story apartment. I loved the view from my balcony, and I would often workout in the nude there. I tripped over one of my weights and was flung over the railing, though I managed to grab hold of the balcony below. Then the guy who lives there comes out just screaming at me, something about fucking his wife whom I've never even met. Before I can explain, he stomps on my hands until I fall. Somehow the bushes broke my fall, but then this asshole literally throws his refrigerator off the balcony at me. At least I got to see that it pulled him over with it, hope he missed the bushes. Anyways the fridge landed on me and now here I am."

"Oh dear, I see. Well that is just awful. Welcome."

The third arrival is now walking up to the gate.

"To pass, you must tell me about your death."

"Hahaha.. okay. So get this, I'm hiding in this refrigerator..."