Guess My Age

A woman decides to have a face-lift for her birthday. She spends $5,000 and feels really good about the results. On her way home, she stops at a newsstand and buys a paper.

Before leaving, she says to the sales clerk, "I hope you don't mind me asking, but how old do you think I am?"

"About 35," was the reply.

"I'm actually 47," the woman says, feeling really happy.

After that, she goes into McDonalds for lunch and asks the clerk the same question.

The reply is, "Oh, you look about 29".

"I am actually 47."

Later, while standing at a bus stop, she asks an old man the same question.

He replies, "I am 85 years old, and my eyesight is going. But when I was young, there was a sure way of telling a woman's age. If I put my hand down your pants and play with you for 10 minutes, I will be able to tell you your exact age."

As there was no one around, the woman thinks, What the hell and lets him slip his hand down her pants.

Ten minutes later, the old man says, "Okay, it's done. You are 47."

Stunned, the woman says, "That was brilliant. How did you do that?"

The old man replies, "I was behind you at McDonalds."

edit: [I have no idea what I've just started here.](http://i.imgur.com/K7QSri1.gifv)

[But I think it's died, and this robot needs to recharge his batteries](http://i.imgur.com/bzt6zGG.gifv).

[but I'll be back.](https://i.imgur.com/oBabmbM.gifv)

edit edit: [made it to 13 hours](http://i.imgur.com/3mE6alT.gifv)

[:D](http://i.imgur.com/YzM6UvT.gif) [MFW it's stopped](http://i.imgur.com/HeCHBeA.gif)

[Going to sleep reddit, I will continue to deliver](http://i.imgur.com/gifbRrE.jpg)

edit3: Just a heads up... This thread goes real deep, so [enjoy](http://i.imgur.com/97MEy.gif). Also, I'll be periodically checking in.