Fruit Joke Request

I'm writing a speech and I need help with a joke, was hoping someone here might have some good ideas.

Part of my speech is where I compare myself to a piece of fruit (currently a peach), using metaphor. I wanted to start out saying something along the lines of "Then I had the epiphany... I was just like this peach... no... I'm not (insert joke)"

The first thought that popped into my head is to say I'm not fruity, but I don't want to be offensive.

Any ideas? I prefer peach related, but any fruit would work.

Thanks!