Ebonics Xmas

Wuz de night befo Crismus


An all ober de hood


Everybody wuz sleepin'


Day wuz sleepin' good.


Everbody wuz sleepin'


all tight in they beds


Whilst Thunderbird Wine


Danced in they heads


I was passed out on de flo


Right next to my Ma


When I heard such a fuss


I thinked "It must be de law!!"


I looked out tru de barz


dat covered my do


Spectin' de sherif


with a warrant fo sho!


Now ober de years


Sanny Claws, he be white.


But it lookin' like us bros


got a black Sanny dis night


Now what I did see


made me say "LAWD Lood at dat!"


It was a huge watermellon cadi


pulled by dwarf rats


Faster than a po-lice car


True de air he came


an whupped up on dem warf rats


an called emm by name.


On Leroy, on Kendrick,


On Jontarious Lee, on Falacious


They was a sight to see


He didn't go down no chimbly


-just picked de lock on my do'


An I says to myself-


"Shit! He done did befo'!"


He had a big sack


full of presents I spect


With Air Jordans and Fake Gold


to go 'round my neck.


But he didn't leave any presents


-just started steelin' my shit


He got my drugs, my stoled guns


an even my burglars kit!


With his sack on his back


Out de winder he flew


I sho woulda catched 'em,


but he stole my knife too!


He jumped on dat watermelon cadi


and pulled out a switch


He was gone in a second


dat son-of-a-bitch


I sho hope nex year


a white Sanny we git


'Cause de black Sanny Claws


jus' ain't wuf a shit!