A kid goes up to his grandpa and sits on his lap. He sees his grandpa is smoking a cigar and says, "hey grandpa, can I have a puff of your cigar?". The grandpa responds, "does your dick touch your asshole?". Kid says "no". Then the grandpa answers, "no you can't have a puff of my cigar".
A few days later the grandkid is sitting on his grandpas lap again. He asks, "hey grandpa can I have a sip of your beer?". Grandpa asks, "does your dick touch your asshole?". Kid replies "no". Grandpa answers, "Then no you can't have a sip of my beer".
The next week the kid is at a party and his grandpa sees him with a plate of cookies. Grandpa asks the grandkid if he can have a cookie. Grandkid asks, "does your dick touch your asshole?". The grandpa says "yes". So the grandkid replies, "good, then go fuck yourself. Grandma made these cookies for me!".
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