An elderly grandfather sits at home rocking slowly in his chair, a puckered scowl upon his face as he watches his 23 year old grandson lounging on the couch playing videogames.
"You're 23 goddamn years old and you're still living with your parents, sitting in the basement playing videogames!" He growls at the young man, "You're wasting your life! You need to get out and do something!"
"Like what?" The grandson inquired.
"When I was your age, some buddies of mine and I went to Paris for the most insane night of debauchery and fun we'd ever had! We got into the most expensive clubs, ran up a huge tab, and got out of paying for a dime of it! We waltzed into the priciest restaraunts without reservations and talked our way into getting a free meal immediately. We went to the hottest strip clubs and got free lap dances, and I even had sex with a stripper onstage and nobody dared to fuck with me and my buddies! We were unstoppable!"
The grandfather smiled as he reminisced, remembering fondly his days in Paris. The younger man furrowed his brow and nodded.
"You know what grandpa? You're right. I do need to go out and do something with my life! I'm gonna grab my buddies and go to Paris, and do the exact same things you did!"
"Atta boy," the elderly man responded.
Two weeks later, the young man came home from Paris. However, when the expectant grandfather opened the door, he found his grandson in a sling, a neckbrace, and with two horribly black eyes.
"What the fuck happened to you?!" grandpa asked.
"I did all the same stuff you did!" The man replied in dismay. "We went to the best clubs, drank up a huge tab, but when we tried to leave without paying, the bouncer beat the shit out of me and broke my arm! We tried to push our way into a restaurant, but when we wouldn't leave the police were called and gave me these two black eyes with their night sticks! And worst of all, we went to a strip club, and when I tried to fuck a stripper onstage, I was nearly beaten to death by all the bouncers at once!"
"Who the hell did you go with?" Asked the grandpa incredulously.
"A group of my buddies. Why, who did YOU go with?" replied the man.
"Well..you know, all the other SS officers."
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