Big Joe

A guy runs into a bar. "I'll have a vodka tonic, but make it snappy!" he says to the bartender.

The barkeep hands him his drink. The guy throws a twenty down and says, "Keep the change. I gotta get out of here, Big Joe's coming!"

Hearing this, patrons all over the bar frantically get up and stampede out the door, tossing cash and credit cards on their tables and the bar to pay their checks.

The bartender splutters in protest as his bar empties, but to no avail. "Man, we gotta get out of here! Big Joe's comin'!!"

Outside, bystanders scatter as a Harley screeches to a halt outside the bar. An impossibly huge, burly, tattooed mammoth in a black leather jacket dismounts, lights a cigar that looks more like a cigarette between his sausage-sized fingers, and stomps his way into the bar.

"GIMME A BEER!!!" he thunders, slapping his hand down on the bar with a **CRACK!!** forceful enough to send empty glasses crashing to the floor.

"Y-yes sir, right away sir," the bartender says, finding his biggest glass and handing it to the behemoth. He tips his head back and drains the entire draft at a single gulp, and the glass shatters in his hand as he slams it back to the bar. "AHHH....THAT'S THE STUFF!"

"Would - would you like another one, sir?" the barkeep asks timidly.

"ARE YOU KIDDING?" the giant roars, "I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE. BIG JOE'S COMIN'!"