Tell this joke to a pregnant woman/expectant father or new mother/dad:
A freshly born baby looks up at the nurse delivering it and asks "Are you my daddy?" (suspend disbelief of talking newborn)
"No, I'm the nurse" she smiles and hands the baby to the doctor.
The baby looks up at the doctor and says "Are you my daddy?"
The doctor smiles and says "No, I'm the doctor" and hands the baby to the father.
The baby looks up at the father and says "Are you my daddy?"
And the father smiles and says "Why YES. YES, I am your daddy!"
"So how does this feel asshole!"
[Poke the joke recipient several times in the forehead with your finger]
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.