"Daughter, I wanted to let you know you were adopted," my mom told me.
"Are you fucking kidding? Really?" I shouted.
"Yup, get ready," she said. "They'll be picking you up in about an 10 minutes."
Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.