A priest walks down a corridor...

A priest is walking down a corridor between the cells in the local prison. As he is walking by the first cell, he sees a man miming playing basketball. He seems to be dribbling this way and that with an imaginary ball, across the floor of his cell. He stops and makes a jump shot, then high fives his invisible teammates.

"Good morning my son, what is it that you are doing?" asks the priest.
"Well," says the inmate, "When I get out of here, I'm going to be a professional basketball player!"
"Very good, my son." replies the priest.

The priest continues down the corridor. Just a few cells later, he spies a man swinging his arms. Looking closer, it appears the man thinks he is playing baseball. The man swings again, then starts running around in his cell.

"What are you up to this morning?" the priest asks the inmate.
"I'm keeping up my skills, because when I get out of here, I'm going to be a professional baseball player!" the inmate replies.

The priest walks further down the hall, uplifted by the hopeful spirits of the young men he has passed. He looks into another cell and finds a man with his pants around his ankles, thrusting his hips madly. As the priest cranes his neck to figure out what the man is doing, he seems to be having his way with a can of Planters.

"And what will you be doing when you get out of here?" says the priest to the pantsless inmate.
To which the inmate replies, "Me? I ain't never gettin out of here, I'm fuckin nuts!"