A older husband and wife are laying in bed...

...when the husband lets go a fart, and the wife says what was that?

the husband says that was a touchdown, 7-0.

about 5 minutes later the wife also lets a fart go and says its 7-7.

then a short while passes and the husband lets another ripper go and says its 14-7.

then the wife lets another one go right after that, 14-14.

then a couple minutes later the wife let a little toot go and says field-goal! 17-14.

The husband is laying there trying not to be outdone desperately trying to squeeze one out when all of a sudden he shits the bed!

The wife frantically says what was that?!?

The husband says it's half time, switch sides.