A man walks into a bar...

Late one Saturday night a man walks into a bar and goes up to the bartender and says

"I got a wager for you"

"what would that be?" the bartender replies

"I'll bet you $500 that I can bite my own eye" the man says plainly.

"Fine, you got yourself a deal" the bartender agreed.

The man pops out his glass eye and proceeds to bite it.

"That'll be $500" the man said with a grin.

Upset the bartender pulls out $500 and hands it to the man. Looking at the bartender he says

"Look, how about this, double or nothing. I'll bet you I can bite my other eye"

"The bartender looks the man over and thinks "well I'm already in the hole. I know he isn't blind so I might win this one"

"Deal" said the bartender.

The man proceeds to pull out his dentures and bite his other eye. Completely depressed the bartender pulls out the rest of the money and hands it to the man.

"Look now, I don't wanna leave you high and dry" said the man. "Here, one last bet. I'll bet you all your money back that if you slide a shotglass down the bar I can piss in it and not miss a drop"

With nothing left to lose the bartender agrees and takes a shotglass and slides it down the bar. Barely getting a drop in the man missing wildly and pisses everywhere.

"YES!!" the bartender said jumping up and down excitedly.

Across the bar a man shouts "GODDAMMIT!!"

"What's his problem?" the bartender asked

"Oh him?" the man replied "I bet him $5,000 I could piss all over the bar and make the bartender happy about it"