A guy is looking for a lawyer...

...so he calls a law firm called Schwartz, Schwartz, Schwartz & Schwartz.

"Hello, Schwartz, Schwartz, Schwartz & Schwartz, how can I help you?"

"I'd like to speak to Mr. Schwartz, please."

"Sorry, he's with a client."

"Alright, then let me speak to Mr. Schwartz."

"He's on a criminal case, he'll be away for three weeks."

"Okay, can I speak to Mr. Schwartz, then?"

"He's not here, he retired last month."

"Fine, then just let me speak to Mr. Schwartz."

"Speaking!"

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