The cop tells him that he was speeding and asks, "Where are you going in such a hurry?"
The man answers, "Well officer, I am really late for work."
The cop says, "What do you do for a living?"
"Well sir, I stretch out assholes all day."
The cop is in disbelief. "You stretch out... assholes?!"
"Yes sir. I start with a brand new asshole, and I put my finger in it. I spin that in a little circle until it is big enough for me to put two fingers in. I spin that in a circle until I can fit my whole hand in. I spin that in a circle until I can fit two hands in. I spin that in a bigger circle until it is six feet tall and I can walk inside of it."
The cop asks, "Son what would you do with a six foot tall asshole."
The guy says, "Well, I'll give him a badge and a radar gun and let him sit out by the bridge all day."
(This is my first NSFW post... not sure if I did it right!)
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