3 guys die and go to hell

So three guys die and go to hell. The first guy is approached by Satan and is asked, "why are you hear?"

He replies, "Dude, I just love food! I love food so much my heart gave out and my stomach exploded!"

Satan looks at him and says, "ok! I'm gonna lock you up in this room here for 10 thousand years with all the delicious foods cooked by the worlds best chefs!" The guy happily bounces his way in the room and is locked in there.

Satan approaches the second guy and asks, "so why are you here?" "I love to fuck! I can't get enough of it. I am always horny! I got all the STDs in world and still can't get enough!".. the guy replies.

Satan looks at him and says, "ok! I'm gonna lock you up in this room here for 10 thousand years with all the slutty, most sexy women that have ever lived; pornstars!" The guy runs into the room with his cock on hand and Satan locks the door.

Satan turns to the third guy and asks, "And you? why are you here?" They guy replies, "yo.. I just love smoking weed, man. I got so high I fuckin died. I just love to smoke."

"Alright!".. Satan yells. "I'm gonna lock you up in this room for 10 thousand years with all the weed, bongs, papers,etc. ," The guy slowly walks in there with a smile and the door shuts behind him.

10,000 years later....

Satan opens the first door and sees food half way eaten, some food is on the floor, chefs aren't doing anything and the guy is doing push-ups and is skinny.

"I can't eat anymore! I literally ate ever I could. I'm free!!!" He grows wings and goes to heaven.

Satan then opens the second door and sees all the women in there bored out of their minds and not doing anything. He sees the guy walking around, humming to himself.

"I have literally fucked the sexuality out of me. I can't do this anymore." He grows wings and goes to heaven.

Satan opens the third and final door and sees nothing has changed. The weed is still in place, the pipes still where they were. Paper is flat; not rolled up. Satan then spots the guy in the corner, in the fetal position, shaking and shivering with horns grown out of his head.

Satan asks "what in the hell happened here!?"

The guy responds... "I've been here 10 thousand years and I ain't got a fuckin lighter."