What different people think, when faced with a glass of water:

Pessimist: The glass is half empty.

Optimist: The glass is half full.

Engineer: The glass is two times larger than it needs to be.

Realist: The glass is half filled.

Therapist: I think that the glass should be viewed via various viewpoints.

Critic: The glass is fucking ugly.

Hipster: Wasn't this water obtained from a river? Too mainstream.

Feminist: The "glass is half full" vs "glass is half empty" debate is just another way, of men trying to overpower women. The fact that I have to answer a question from a male, and then have myself judged and labelled as something, dependant from my answer, is misogyny. Oh, and by the way, I was once raped by a glass that was filled 50% with water, so thanks for triggering my PTSD.

Opportunist: While you guys were arguing about the glass, I drank it!

Sadist: I poisoned it.

Masochist: I'm thirsty.

You might also enjoy

Many of the jokes are contributions from our users. If you find anything offensive and against our policy please report it here with a link to the page. We will do everything to make this an enjoyable platform for everyone.