Toy -isms

Capitalism - He who dies with the most toys, wins.


Hari Krishna - He who plays with the most toys, wins.


Judaism - He who buys toys at the lowest price, wins.


Catholicism - He who denies himself the most toys, wins.


Anglican - They were our toys first.


Greek Orthodox - No, they were OURS first.


Branch Davidians - He who dies playing with the biggest toys,
wins.


Atheism - There is no toy maker.


Polytheism - There are many toy makers.


Evolutionism - The toys made themselves.


Church of Christ, Scientist - We are the toys.


Communism - Everyone gets the same number of toys, and you go
straight to hell if we catch you selling yours.


B'Hai - All toys are just fine with us.


Amish - Toys with batteries are surely a sin.


Taoism - The doll is as important as the dumptruck.


Mormonism - Every boy can have as many toys as he wants.


Voodoo - Let me borrow that doll for a second.


Hedonism - Screw the rule book! Let's play!


Hinduism - He who plays with bags of plastic farm animals, loses.


7th Day Adventist - He who plays with his toys on Saturday,
loses.


Church of Christ - He whose toys make music, loses.


Baptist - Once played, always played.


Jehovah's Witnesses - He who sells the most toys door-to-door,
wins.


Pentecostalism - He whose toys can talk, wins.


Existentialism - Toys are a figment of your imagination.


Confucianism - Once a toy is dipped in the water, it is no
longer dry.


Non-denominationalism - We don't care where the toys came from,
let's just play with them.


Agnosticism - It is not possible to know whether toys make a
damn bit of difference.