Tourist walks into a bar..

he orders a pint and starts supping it, when a dwarf walks in, goes over to the piano and starts playing. Bemused the tourist motions to the barman and asks about the dwarf.

"It's a funny story actually," says the barman. "See this lamp? If you rub it and make a wish, your wish will come true."
The tourist looks incredulous but takes the lamp and starts rubbing it. "Give me a million bucks!" he calls. A moment later there's a hideous din coming from outside the bar. He goes out and in the street are thousands upon thousands of ducks, quacking away.

The tourist goes back inside and says to the barman; "This is bullshit! I asked for a million bucks but I got a million ducks!"

The barman replies, "Well do you think I asked for a twelve inch Pianist?"

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