In Nebraska, police arrested a man with a container that had “Not Weed” written on it, which turned out to have weed inside. The officer who opened the container is currently in a state of catatonic shock.
Hillary Clinton used her personal email address during her four years as secretary of state. Even more alarming, Joe Biden conducts all of his official business via SnapChat.
The US Justice Department concluded that the Ferguson police department’s practices are racially-biased. For example, criminal behavior that would result in the police shooting a black person, would result in a white person being given an ice cream sandwich.
It’s been revealed that Chris Brown is the father of a nine-month-old baby. Doctors believe it’s the first time a woman has gotten pregnant after being punched in the vagina.
Online retailer Etsy is filing for a $100 million dollar IPO. In true Etsy fashion, each share of stock will be handmade, and sewn together with the dreadlocks from an 8 year old child.
The Army has begun easing the ban on transgendered soldiers. The new relaxed ban allows the Army to reassign generals, and swap out their privates.
Boko Haram has pledged their allegiance to the terrorist group ISIS. The new terror group hasn’t decided on a name yet, so in the meantime they’re referring to themselves as “The Guardians of the Galaxy.”
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