Timmy's 10th birthday.

It was Timmy's 10th birthday. As it happens, his parents never really cared a lot about Timmy and Timmy, knowing this, wasn't expecting much of his special day. He got up in the morning, much against his will, to find his parents in their daily routine. "Hi kiddo" was as much as his dad ever bothered to say. Naturally, they had forgotten his birthday.
"Aren't you guys forgetting something?" he asked. His dad checked if he was wearing pants, which he wasn't, and said he'd put them on when he'd leave for work.
"No, dad!" Timmy said desperately, "it's my birthday today!"
"Are you sure?" his mom doubted.
"Of course I'm sure, jeez!!" said Timmy frustrated, "you guys couldn't care less, you don't even know how old i'm turning today"
"Sure I do," was dad's confident reply, "must be eleven by now".
"Wrong" said Timmy.
"Nine?" guessed his mom.
"No, 10! I'm 10! It's my 10th birthday today, you idiots!"

Timmy stormed out into the adjacent living room where he found his grandma, who lived in with them, sat knitting in front of the tv.
"What about you, grandma?" he asked. Grandma didn't look up from her knitting.
"What about me, Timmy?"
"Do you know how old I'm turning?"

Grandma looked up at him. She put her knitting aside and asked him to come here. She pulled down Timmy's pajama pants. She pulled down his underwear and put his tiny balls and penis in her hand. She felt him gently, pulled his foreskin, jiggled and kneaded his balls a little, seemed to weigh them, sniffed at his penis. After what felt like minutes, she pulled his underwear and pajama pants back up and turned to her knitting again.
"You're turning 10 today" she said.
Timmy stood there, flabbergasted, lost for words.
"Wow, grandma, how did you do that?"
"I just heard you tell your parents"