The Top 18 Signs You're Pledging The Wrong Fraternity

18> Three Words: Sigma Alpha Macarena.


17> Nobody joins in your armpit rendition of "Louie, Louie."


16> Each meeting turns into an argument between the two of you
about who gets to be president and who gets to be vice
president.


15> Every spring break: a bitchin' road trip to the Nixon
Library.


14> You're the ONLY minority to pledge Kappa Kappa Kappa.


13> A bunch of college guys sitting around knitting and
reading romance novels is just too damn weird.


12> Assembly room features a runway and posters of Dennis Rodman
in drag.


11> The secret handshake involves removing your pants.


10> Pledge week started with a shaved head and toga party,
but now you're selling flowers at the airport.


 9> "Republican Convention?!?  ROOOOAD
TRIIIIP!"


 8> "Tropical Nights" party is authentic right down to
the malaria epidemic.


 7> Initiation involves flying a crop duster over the
White House.


 6> Every time someone yells "Biff! Muffy's on the
phone!" the whole damn house comes running.


 5> Every Monday night is "Melrose
Place"/self-breast-exam night.


 4> In EVERY room, at EVERY function, out of EVERY
speaker:  John Tesh


 3> Their idea of a wild party: slam out a few pages of
code, then memorize "Star Trek" dialogue.


 2> Their good looks, fabulous wealth, and popularity
are sure signs that they're gonna get their comeuppance in a
big, humiliating way by a ragtag group of misfits at
homecoming.


1> "Smegma" may sound like a letter in the Greek
alphabet, but it's not.


            
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