The Top 15 Signs Your Online Romance Is Bogus

15> Keeps suggesting that you demonstrate the depth of your devotion to each other by exchanging credit card numbers.


14> His IM messages are chockablock with correct grammar usage and impeccable spelling.


13> Subject: "Handsome Nigerian Prince Needs Your Help To Deliver 45M US Kisses"


12> Given LonelyXPOTUS42@aol.com's desperate, cheesy come-ons, it's gotta be fake... right?


11> She claims to be both a pop superstar *and* a virgin.


10> She keeps saying she knows an all-natural, healthy way to increase your manly length by five to ten inches.


9> Says your engagement ring is available "FOR A LIMITED TIME ONLY!!"


8> Small trouble: refers to self in third person.


Big trouble: alternates between "he" and "she."


7> Strange that a Victoria's Secret model can get so worked up over a "Star Wars" vs. "Star Trek" debate.


6> Your best friend is also involved with an animated paper clip. Could there be two?


5> "... and then I started Top5, which has brought me international fame and millions of dollars. So what do you do?"


4> He's the third astrophysicist this week to ask you to forward a picture of your boobs.


3> Responds to your e-mails with "Are you the Nykeela who's 25 and like walks along the beach or the Nykeela who's so hot she makes the sun seem like a flickering candle?"


2> "Hello, $RECIPIENT_NAME, you're like no other $GENDER I've ever met. I think I'm falling in $EMOTION with you!"


1> Your 17-year-old hottie slips up and mentions how bad it was in Nam.


[ The Top 5 List www.topfive.com ]


[ Copyright 2003 by Chris White ]