The New Car

One day, I had to pick up my ne're do well brother because his car had broken down.
I probably shouldn't have done this, but I wanted to show off my cool new car I got, so I agreed.

I left work at about five o clock and I went to the gas station before I picked up my brother. Of course, after a few bad incidences with the gas station attendants, I discovered that self serve was the way to go, so I pulled up and hopped out of my car.
When I was finished pumping the gas, I pulled out the pump, but I had forgotten to completely let go of the handle, so some gas spilled out onto the sleeve of my jacket .
'Big deal' I thought, and I paid for the gas and got back into the car. Well, something you must know about my brother is that he's a terribly addicted smoker, and of course, he has no regard for peoples things, not even their new car with leather seats. So, of course, the first thing that brother of mine does when he gets in the car, is lights up a cigarette.
Remember the gas I spilled on my jacket? Well, needless to say, one spark from that lighter sent my arm bursting into flames.
"CRAP!" I screamed. I pulled the car over and jumped out. I was waving my arm around like crazy trying to get that fire out. Luckily, a policeman drove by and stopped to help me. He had a fire extinguisher in his cruiser and he used it to put out the fire on my arm.
"Thank you officer" I said "If you hadn't stopped to help me, my arm could have burned off!"
"It was no problem ma'am," the officer replied in very formal police style,
"but I'm sorry, I'm going to have to give you a fine"
"Why officer?" I said, completely shocked
He Replied "FOR USING A FIREARM WITHOUT A LICENCE"